The wedding bands are the creation of an heirloom meant to be passed down as a symbol of a lifetime of love and family. Yet in the midst of a divorce, those heirlooms feel lost, just as the future as a family is. At least that is what I thought before I realized I could use those same rings to continue to inspire that same message to my children. It wasn’t easy, but eventually I made the choice to transform my rings into heirlooms for my daughters to symbolize both the past and the beginning of something new for our family. New rings for the new chapter.

The Heirloom Tradition

Heirloom jewelry has a special place in my family. Over the years, my mother has given my sister and I many family heirlooms. Every time I wear a piece of that jewelry it rekindles the special moments I shared with my grandparents and great grandparents. It’s not just jewelry, but a constant reminder of my heritage and I am always proud to wear them. But yet with my own wedding bands, I felt if I continued to hold onto my rings that it meant I was holding onto my past and I wouldn’t be able to break free from that prior life.

wedding rings after divorce

To Sell Or Not To Sell

Selling the rings was something I considered, but in my heart I didn’t feel right about it. At one time, the rings symbolized commitment, family and future. If the rings could be re-purposed into new pieces for my girls then they would have the opportunity to continue a tradition. They can rekindle stories of those who have loved them while sharing their special memories of both families and their traditions. The rings would start a new tradition and eventually be passed down for many generations, triggering new emotions for many years to come, just as my grandparents rings do for me.

wedding rings after divorce

Re-purposing The Rings

After I made the decision not to sell, I still didn’t know what to do. As a mom to my little princesses one of the thoughts that crossed my mind after my divorce was how I would be able to reinvent the tradition and still be able to provide my little girls with sentimental pieces of jewelry as they grow up. After many months of contemplation on what I was going to do with the rings, I decided to have them made into unique pieces of jewelry for Clansie Jean and Roselle.

wedding rings after divorce

New Chapter: New Rings

A local jeweler guided me through the process of creating new rings for the new chapter. He was able to take my vision and turn something very hard to let go of (mostly dreams and plans for the future) into new family heirlooms for the girls to pass down to their children one day. It took me many weeks to pick the pieces of jewelry up because I was having anxiety about it. After handling emotions of sadness, anger, guilt, loneliness, and broken promises after the divorce I wanted to make sure I had a place to deposit whatever feelings would come over me.

These rings symbolized unity, but yet we separated.  A broken promise became our new beginning to start over and vow to my children that following through with promises can still exist. I want them to look at those rings and let the sparkle be a reminder of their strength to keep moving forward, face whatever obstacles the day may bring, and know they can be and do anything.

wedding rings after divorce

Not All Love Is Lost

I saw the new jewelry and I was elated how everything turned out. I knew I made a hard decision a happy one. Clansie Jean’s first set of earrings were made out of the side stones of the engagement ring. She has been talking a lot lately about wanting to get her ears pierced. Their dad and I surprised her one afternoon with the earrings and the joy that was written all over her face was something that will be a vivid snapshot for as long as I live. Clansie was so unbelievably happy to have us there together, even if it was only for a moment. This is proof that you can make the most out of the old and turn it into a sentimental gift. I made a tough decision the best decision for my sweet girls.

Clansie Jean and Roselle will always know those heirlooms came from mom and dad. Not all love is lost. Anyone can have diamonds: an heirloom is an ornament of quite a different kind

For more stories from the heart, checkout To The Mom Having Day. 

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